The Psychological Reason
Our minds have always been on the hunt for our perfect companion, not just somebody who is perfect but someone who is subconsciously perfect to you. Even if you’re not currently longing for or desiring a partner, your mind will always be searching for it and to fall in love, but why is that?
The answer is, our mind and how it works. Even if you don’t realise it, our minds are always subconsciously seeking for the perfect woman/man. With our own personal principles on the other sex, we can easily identify the right person for us, this is usually perceived as our own individual criteria.
Everyone has his or her own preferences, likes and dislikes. Especially when it comes to finding our significant other. It can be simple things based on physical appearance such as hair colour, their eye colour, figure or nationality, but overall we all have different expectations people need to meet in order to identify them as the right one. If they don’t have these quality’s you seek, you’ll befriend them rather than see them as a lover. For example, there is a blonde and brunette, the guy prefers brunettes, so he’s instantly more physically attracted to the brunette, this is how your criteria works.
But what makes up our criteria? It’s simply based on your personal likes and dislikes, otherwise known as our taste in women/men. Our tastes can also be made up from background, personal beliefs and your experiences with other relationships (that have either succeeded or failed). We all have different tastes, but some quality’s are made up from cave men years such as birth giving hips, long hair etc.
Here is an example or somebody’s criteria in play.
Jamie wants a woman with the similar education as him, possibly somebody who went to the same school/college or studied the same course as him. Jamie is more interested in brunettes (he has had bad experiences with blondes in the past, so his mind added this to give compensation for his past failures). He also wants a woman who is good with children (men want women to be good with children, because he would eventually want children and would want a woman who would care and love them just as much as he does). If a women doesn’t have these quality’s Jamie would rather be friends with her than have a relationship with her.
Why do some people find it hard to recover from a break up?
Sometimes when people rely on the idea of true love, they can interpret wrongly with the thought that only one person would meet her criteria and be right for her/him. When realistically there are many people out there that would meet this expectation. Therefore, they find it hard when they lose what seems to be the only person for them. If you are now dealing with a break up, then just get rid of ‘the one’ philosophy. You will soon get over from your break up
So, love at first sight does exist?
Yes, yes it does for the following reasons.
When you encounter somebody who meets your criteria, you’ll instantly be drawn towards them, this is usually portrayed as love at first sight, by them being in your sight while you fall in love with them. You can also find yourself falling for somebody who looks, acts or reminds you of a previous lover due to past feelings of love for them.
If you are heavily dependent on physical appearance, you’ll find it easier to find yourself falling in love than if you rely more on personality qualities, individuality or persona, since physical appearance is the first thing you’ll notice when you come across somebody.
Carl J. Lewis is a student of psychology. He loves to do psychological analysis on love-relationship. He shares his knowledge on many website across the internet.