Shopping around for prospective dates can be taxing on the spirit, making some of us yearn for the days of arranged marriages where dating not only wasn’t as rough – it didn’t even exist.
But as you’re making your weekend crawl through the bars, testing person after person on your own personal dating criteria, it’s important to take mental notes on the things that assuredly work for you in the dating world as well as the things that don’t. Dating, in the end, is a rolling checklist of educated guesses: the more you date, the more you begin to understand what you want out of a long-term relationship.
Still, that doesn’t mean there are not consistent qualities to be found in every satisfying, well-rounded date. Whether you are considering dating that person you just can’t help but run into while in public or that friend you’re always just a little flirtier with than you should be, there exists a short list of redeeming characteristics that can reliably tell you whether a life with your potential date really is “meant to be.”
Enumerated below are five key questions to ask yourself before embarking into dating territory with your prospect:
- Can he/she carry a conversation? If the conversation doesn’t move beyond the weather or the happenings of your respective days, re-evaluate whether the person is really worth dating. It is entirely possible that one of you is nervous in the flow of conversation, but if an awkward conversational lull happens on one occasion, it will undoubtedly happen again. Besides good sex, good conversation is the foundation of a progressive relationship: build upon it.
- How are they dressed? Call it fickle, but judging people by what they wear is what we do – people create entire careers out of it. As much as you want to find a match in personality, you want to find someone stunning who you won’t mind wearing on your arm for an evening out, either. No one wants to be a part of the disproportional couple.
- What does the person draw out in you? This question is probably more easily answered by someone who is looking to date a long-time friend suddenly being seen in a new light, but consider what side the prospective person pulls forth from the depths of your personality. You want to date someone who brings out the sides of you that you love. Don’t date an instigator, and certainly don’t date someone who makes you uncomfortable with who you are.
- How is the chemistry? Sometimes, determining whether someone is worth dating or not is as simple as whether you feel those butterflies swarming in your stomach. If the answer is “yes,” rejoice in being problem-free. Even if the two of you don’t work out after going on a date, you’ll surely have some sexual magic to take advantage of or at the very least flirtation to keep the night interesting.
- How do your lifestyles compare? In the beginning stages of dating, lifestyle differences are going to be the most emphasized, whether they are laid-out on the table directly or not. First consider differences that might be life-changing (kids, divorced, finances, etc.), and move down the list from there. If you don’t see any red flags, feel free to move forward with the date.
Ultimately, determining if someone is worth your time is a decision you will have to make, but certainly take into consideration the few on-the-surface details that might save you time, frustration, and even a few bucks along the way. Testing the waters can be fun with just the right amount of dating due diligence.